At this time of year, my thoughts return to my father. He has been gone quite a while, but the memory of him lingers. I often wonder what he would think of what is happening in our world today if he came back.
I grew up with a father who believed in being “the” father. I confess that he wasn’t always right all the time, but what he said was law in our house. That is, of course, unless his wife contradicts him. Then it was time for us children to seek shelter outside where we couldn’t hear what was going on.
I can’t help but believe that some of the problems we have in our society today wouldn’t be as bad if we had parents. How many families are there where children grow up not knowing their father? No wonder they have no respect for authority.
Although my father was not a very well educated person, he knew how to use the Education Board in the Seat of Learning for all of his children. Some of the things he did back in the day would get him into some real legal trouble today.
For example. My father believed that he had the right to be judge, jury and executioner in all things in the lives of his children, without appealing to a higher authority.
In the kitchen, hanging next to the door to go outside was a very interesting parenting tool, at least in my father’s eyes. It was an oar with a religious inscription, “I need you every hour.” The inscription was quite true to the reality of life in our home.
Spanking was a routine exercise in our house. My father had the idea that if you had problems at school, you also had problems at home. He had this fantastic idea that the teacher was right and I was wrong. I guess he knew me and he could take a little bit of truth and turn it into a lie. I wonder who I learned that from.
Several times I got into trouble at school, which involved a beating in the principal’s office. The first time this happened, I remember very well walking into the kitchen and seeing my father standing there holding that infamous lollipop in his hand. Within moments, the paddle was doing his duty and I was doing the “paddle dance.”
After we rowed, my father sat down with me and said, “Okay, what trouble did you get into at school to get rowed by the principal?”
I wished he had asked me before he rowed, because now he had no incentive to lie. Looking back, maybe that was the whole purpose of rowing.
I well remember one time in the backyard, I did something that required parental action. My father looked at me and said, “Go get me a switch. You need to be taught a lesson.”
At the time, I thought it was funny, however after the fact I couldn’t see any humor in it. I went to find the “switch” according to my father’s instructions and returned with a twig. I thought it was funny, but my father had no sense of humor about it. Within moments, my sense of humor evaporated because my dad went looking for a switch, which is a lot different than a twig, just ask my butt.
Reflecting on these things, I tried to calculate how many spankings I actually received during my life. Let me say that it was significant. More than that. He taught me respect for authority.
I wonder if any of these young people getting into trouble today ever got beaten up. Of course, today that goes completely against PC. My father did not believe in PC, but he strongly believed in BS (Back Side). I think if today’s parents focused more on BS than PC, things could be a lot different.
Today, people think that such old-fashioned whipping represents cruel and unusual punishment. However, if you look at this generation that hasn’t had an old-fashioned spanking; I think the evidence speaks for itself.
To whip or not to whip, that is the dilemma today. Most gravitate towards the “don’t spank” aspect without knowing that they are causing a lot of damage to the next generation.
I must say that my father was not very interested in what people call “love” today. He was more interested in respecting authority. In fact, as I think about this, when you are respecting authority you are showing love. People today do not know how to love because they do not know how to respect authority.
I think that if some of these young people could spend a week with my father and his infamous “popsicle”, they would come to respect authority. Unfortunately, there is no authority figure in most homes today. Even those households that have fathers are forced to believe that the father has no real significance in the family.
All I can do is quote a famous psychologist: “How does that work?”
Well how does that work?
The wisest man in the world, Solomon, said, “For the Lord corrects the one he loves, as a father corrects the son he loves” (Proverbs 3:12).
True love always corrects what is wrong, especially in the person you love.